Parents who call Career Counseling Connecticut increasingly tell me that they face a question where they do not have a clear answer:
Should we help our adult children with their career challenges? The answer is simple: “yes”.
My generation – 50 and over – was profoundly affected by scores of movies, TV shows, and general media warnings against the domineering parent. As such, the most common refrain I hear from parents: “It is his (or her) life. I don’t want to interfere. It will cause a strain in our relationship.”
But some areas of life – marriage/parenthood, health, and career – are so significant to overall life happiness that unless you think your parental duties end when your children leave the house you should help if possible.
The how you can/should help is a much bigger, more nuanced topic. But the “why” is easily answered
The why you should help can be partially explained in broad strokes.
- Self-esteem is highly connected to career. Twentysomethings who have floundering careers start to feel bad about themselves.
- Lack of career path has become the dominant reason why young adults do not start families. This is still a gender tilted issue but, suffice to say, men push off marriage – and fatherhood – until they feel settled into a career.
- The work world is dramatically different than back in our day. “He’ll figure it out” used to be translated into “someone will hire him.”. That’s not the case anymore.
- It gets harder as time passes. Too many twentysomethings started post college unemployment with the thought that they’ll get a job after the summer. The summer then becomes a year. After a year or two, a whole host of factors start making it more difficult to gain career traction. If they have a job but know it is not a long term fit, then they need to move on sooner than later. Otherwise, they will be branding themselves in a career that doesn’t suit them.
- Assuming you can figure out the how – the default being sending them to us – you will build your relationship in a healthy way – the wise mentor.
Of course, the easiest way to help without causing conflict is to get an expert to help your child.
Contact us. 860 510-0410 or e-mail.