Quick research: what percentage of parents are funding their young adult children?
Dozens of articles will come up. Here’s one:
Parents are financing their not-yet-financially-independent adult children
The Best Financial Move a Parent Can Make: Avoid Funding Adulthood
I have a client from Old Lyme, CT. He has two older children from a prior marriage. One is turning 30 and the other is 27. Both are underemployed. He pays the rent for both of their apartments, their health insurance, their car insurance, their phones, and unexpected expenses. He came to me with his 16-year-old, noting that he didn’t want to make the same mistake of “letting them figure it out.”
My Old Lyme client was being too hard on himself.
A decade ago, it did not seem unusual for college counseling clients to focus entirely on “fit” for the college. “They will figure it out” was not an uncommon phrase used by parents who sent their children to college with no discussion about career paths.
Parents often assume that the biggest financial risks to their future are market volatility, healthcare costs, or long-term care.
Those matter. But there is another risk that is rarely discussed—and often far more expensive.
Funding an adult child indefinitely.
The Financial Reality Parents Confront Too Late
Let us start with several unambiguous facts:
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Many young adults remain financially dependent well into their late 20s and 30s
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Career drift, not failure, is the most common reason for extended dependence
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Even modest monthly support compounds into six-figure transfers over time
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Ongoing support delays parents’ own retirement flexibility and risk tolerance
What begins as “temporary help” frequently becomes a standing line item in a parent’s budget.
Rent assistance.
Health insurance.
Tuition extensions.
Living expenses during “figuring it out.”
None of this is planned—but all of it is common.
Career Confusion Is a Direct Financial Liability—for Parents
When a young adult lacks:
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A clear understanding of how they create economic value
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A realistic career trajectory
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The ability to earn a self-supporting income
the financial burden does not disappear.
It simply shifts upward—to the parents.
In practice, parents become:
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De facto income stabilizers
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Safety nets without end dates
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Unofficial retirement plans for their own children
This is not a moral failure. It is a structural one.
Why Parents Underestimate the Cost
Parents often misjudge the financial impact because:
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The costs arrive gradually
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Each decision seems compassionate in isolation
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Saying “yes” feels easier than enforcing limits
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Hope substitutes for planning
But over time, these decisions materially affect:
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Retirement timing
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Investment risk tolerance
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Lifestyle choices
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Psychological peace
From a strictly financial standpoint, the most prudent move a parent can make is this:
Invest early in a child’s ability to support themselves—or prepare to subsidize them later.
Helping a young adult achieve career clarity, employability, and income stability:
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Reduces long-term parental financial exposure
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Preserves retirement optionality
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Prevents emotionally charged money conversations later
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Protects family relationships from resentment and dependency dynamics
Money spent helping a child become independent almost always costs less than money spent keeping them afloat.
Career counseling, realistic labor-market education, and structured accountability are not indulgences.
They are risk management tools for parents.