That’s the simple answer. The simple explanation is that some areas of life – marriage/parenthood, health, and career – are so significant to overall life happiness that unless you think your parental duties end when your children leave the house you should help if possible.
The how you can/should help is a much bigger, more nuanced topic. I’ve started writing a new book on college to career transition based on several hundred case studies from Career Counseling Connecticut. A full chapter will be required on the delicate balance needed to gently, provide suggestions to your child in a way that serves him/her and does not create conflict.
The why you should help can be partially explained in broad strokes.
- Self-esteem is highly connected to career. Twentysomethings who have floundering careers start to feel bad about themselves.
- Lack of career path has become the dominant reason why young adults do not start families. This is still a gender tilted issue but, suffice to say, men push off marriage – and fatherhood – until they feel settled into a career.
- The work world is dramatically different than back in our day. “He’ll figure it out” used to be translated into “someone will hire him.”. That’s not the case anymore.
- It gets harder as time passes. Too many twentysomethings started post college unemployment with the thought that they’ll get a job after the summer. The summer then becomes a year. After a year or two, a whole host of factors start making it more difficult to gain career traction. If they have a job but know it is not a long term fit, then they need to move on sooner than later. Otherwise, they will be branding themselves in a career that doesn’t suit them.
- Assuming you can figure out the how – the default being sending them to us – you will build your relationship in a healthy way – the wise mentor.