I have taken on a handful of clients in the last few years: young adults – these happen to be young men – who are not meeting with me for “help” through a challenge but rather to affirmatively build their future.
They are doing incredibly well.
Much like it is with coaches of top athletes, I am not suggesting our work has been “the reason” for their success. But they – generously – say it has been a big reason.
They came to me due to their far-sighted parents. The parents – many of whom had worked with executive coaches or at least were aware of how much help a coach can provide – knew that outside expertise could help leverage their driven son’s ability.
At the moment, the 6 that I am working with are in some combination of top colleges, top jobs, and, in one case, the young CEO of a venture funded company.
Here’s the hope: your children are entering a time when they can create their own work world in brilliant fashion.
When I wrote my first book, Motivate Your Son, I referenced three general paths that I believed young people were increasingly likely to follow: the path of abundance, the path of struggle, and the path of disaster.
At the time, I estimated that perhaps 10% would follow the path of abundance, 40% the path of struggle, and 50% the path of disaster.
Those percentages were not intended as precise statistical predictions. My thesis was grounded in what I was seeing through my work with young people, combined with research I was reading about education, employment, and the changing transition to adulthood.
Unfortunately, much of what concerned me then has become more visible today.
The Path of Disaster
“Disaster” may be too strong a word. But the phenomenon I was describing was the increasing number of young adults who were having difficulty becoming financially self-sufficient – ever.
When I wrote Motivate Your Son, we were nowhere near 50%. But I worried that we were heading in that direction.
I could see some of the causes developing in schools. Too many students were moving through adolescence without developing the combination of motivation, discipline, practical skills, and resilience necessary for adulthood.
The book focused primarily on boys and young men. Today, some of these challenges apply more broadly to both sexes, although young men still seem to be struggling disproportionately in several important areas.
The ultimate problem is not simply unemployment.
A young adult might have a job and still be unable to create an independent adult life. If someone in their late twenties or thirties cannot support themselves without significant financial assistance from parents or others, something has gone wrong in the transition to adulthood.
The Path of Struggle
The second group is much larger and more conventional.
These young adults will work. They will build careers. Many will marry, buy homes, and raise families.
But they may discover that the traditional middle-class formula has become considerably harder.
They might have what previous generations considered a “good job” and still find themselves barely able to absorb an unexpected $5,000 expense.
If they start a family, both partners may need to work full-time—not necessarily because both are passionately committed to their careers, but because their financial structure requires two incomes.
They may work harder than they expected for less financial security than they expected.
This is the path of struggle.
It is not a bad life. Indeed, many people on this path will build happy and meaningful lives.
But economically, they may find themselves constantly running just to remain in place.
The Path of Abundance
Then there is the third possibility that has become one of my favorite aspects of Career Counseling Connecticut.
This was the group that fascinated me when I wrote Motivate Your Son, and it fascinates me even more today.
I could see that the changing economy was not simply creating problems. It was also removing barriers.
For most people in my generation, the early career path was relatively rigid.
You went to school. You obtained credentials. You applied for jobs. You waited for someone older and more powerful to give you an opportunity. You worked your way up the organizational hierarchy. Eventually, perhaps, you accumulated enough expertise, money, reputation, and connections to create something of your own.
Young people today do not necessarily have to wait.
A 22-year-old can start a company.
A 19-year-old can develop expertise in an emerging technology.
A college student can build an audience.
A young professional can create a consulting practice, develop a product, learn sophisticated technical skills, build a network across the country, or collaborate with people around the world.
Most importantly, young people now have access to extraordinary amounts of knowledge.
The ambitious young person who takes education seriously—not simply schooling, but education—can acquire skills at a speed that would have been unimaginable when I was young.
And this is where I see enormous hope and where I can help.
You Can Create Your Own Work World
The young people who thrive in the coming decades may not be those who simply ask:
“What job should I get?”
They may ask a much more interesting question:
“What kind of work world can I create?”
That requires a different approach to career planning.
Build skills.
Build credentials where credentials matter.
Learn how to communicate.
Learn how to sell.
Learn how businesses operate.
Become technologically sophisticated.
Develop expertise in something valuable.
Find mentors.
Meet interesting people.
Experiment with projects while you are young enough that failure costs very little.
And above all, become exceptionally good at something that other people value.
Do those things for five or ten years and something remarkable can happen.
You stop waiting for the work world to tell you where you fit.
You begin creating a work world that fits you.
The Great Opportunity
There is a great paradox taking place in the American economy.
For the unprepared, the new work world may be increasingly unforgiving.
For the adequately prepared, it may produce a perfectly respectable but increasingly challenging middle-class existence.
But for the highly motivated, highly skilled, entrepreneurial, and adaptable young person, this may be one of the greatest periods of opportunity in history.
You do not need to wait until you are 40 to start creating your life.
You can begin at 18.
You can begin at 22.
You can begin at 27.
You can build skills, relationships, credentials, businesses, intellectual property, investments, and multiple sources of income far earlier than previous generations typically could.
That is what I meant years ago by the path of abundance.
And today, I believe that path is wider than ever.
The challenge is that nobody is going to automatically put you on it.
You have to choose it.